Well, if you’re male you’re born with your dick already attached to you, so technically you’re touching it from birth. Maybe it’s just if you touch it with your hands? What if you wear gloves? Use tongs? Telekinesis? And can you touch someone ELSE’s dick? Because if it’s any dick a bug could land on you and walk across your body, dragging its bug dick along you and there’d be nothing you could do. And what of ghost dicks? Can’t even see those, how are you supposed to avoid them?
If God is truly omnipotent, then he/she would be male, female, and everything in-between and beyond. If a being is limited to a single sex, it isn’t all-powerful, after all.
This page raises fascinating new philosophical quandaries, however: are the creatures WITHOUT dicks (or the ability to touch their dicks) more pure or less pure? Does God judge dick-touching based on one’s capacity to do so, or is it simply a binary yes/no situation?
Also what the Hell, Jesus? You really couldn’t have mentioned these rules while you were partying it up with all your wine and fish? Like dude you had one job.
Dropping some philosophy on Pasqy!
So like, what if a dick touches you? Does that count?
Only for the other guy.
He’s right, God wouldn’t be able to answer our prayers if he were a woman because he’d be busy bleeding and getting pregnant!
Sure am glad that’s not the case!
So I didn’t have to observe the two-shake rule after all?
I mean you’re going to hell anyway may as well go big or go home.
If I went to Heaven and found out that God was a woman I’d kill myself.
Lord did I miss this shit.
I’m not allowed to touch my dick?
Good God, I don’t think there’s a pit deep enough to match my sins.
>tfw you find out the fucking Muslims were right
Well shit
What if you learned to masturbate with your thighs?
Does that count?
Well, if you’re male you’re born with your dick already attached to you, so technically you’re touching it from birth. Maybe it’s just if you touch it with your hands? What if you wear gloves? Use tongs? Telekinesis? And can you touch someone ELSE’s dick? Because if it’s any dick a bug could land on you and walk across your body, dragging its bug dick along you and there’d be nothing you could do. And what of ghost dicks? Can’t even see those, how are you supposed to avoid them?
Judith had the last laugh after all.
Wait, how did the baby go to hell? Did he already jerk his little ding dong?
Probably
Aurora is god
If God is truly omnipotent, then he/she would be male, female, and everything in-between and beyond. If a being is limited to a single sex, it isn’t all-powerful, after all.
This page raises fascinating new philosophical quandaries, however: are the creatures WITHOUT dicks (or the ability to touch their dicks) more pure or less pure? Does God judge dick-touching based on one’s capacity to do so, or is it simply a binary yes/no situation?
Also what the Hell, Jesus? You really couldn’t have mentioned these rules while you were partying it up with all your wine and fish? Like dude you had one job.